


Please Don't Go

by cestlestialbeings



Series: Unrequited Wincest [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean Winchester Has Abandonment Issues, Heterosexual Dean Winchester, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Season/Series 02, Unrequited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:49:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26248222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cestlestialbeings/pseuds/cestlestialbeings
Summary: Dean sleeps with Sam to keep him from leaving.
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester
Series: Unrequited Wincest [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2001400
Comments: 17
Kudos: 83





	Please Don't Go

Sam was shoving his clothes into a duffel bag, avoiding Dean’s eyes. Dean couldn’t do anything but watch helplessly as Sam worked as quickly as possible to leave.

“Sam, you don’t have to go.”

Sam shook his head. “I can’t stay, not after this.”

 _This_. The creature they’d been hunting had compelled them both to tell the truth. The truth was that Sam was in love with Dean, had been since they were kids. The truth was that Dean was disgusted by the very thought. The monster had gotten a kick out of that, before they’d killed it.

But the damage was done.

“This doesn’t have to change anything,” Dean pleaded. “Come on, man, I need you.”

Sam stopped packing to pause and look at Dean. “This changes everything, Dean. The way you looked at me…” Sam looks away, a pained expression on his face.

Dean’s heart wrenched. Sure, he hadn’t reacted to Sam’s confession in the most gracious way. It had been unexpected, and it had been weird. But that didn’t change the fact Sam was his brother. The person he counted on most in the world. And with Dad gone, Sam was all he had left. No matter what freakish kinks Sam might have, Dean knew he couldn’t live without him.

“Sammy, please,” Dean said. “I was just surprised. I’ll get over it, I swear. I’m already over it.”

Sam shook his head again. He zipped up his duffel and made it to the door, opening it halfway before Dean caught up and pushed it shut.

“Hey,” he said, spinning Sam around and shoving him against the door. “It doesn’t have to be like this.”

“Like what? Me pining over you, and you thinking I’m a disgusting freak? No, it doesn’t have to be like that. Not if I leave.”

Sam moved to leave again, and Dean did the first thing that came to mind.

He kissed Sam.

“Dean, what—“ Sam started to say against his mouth, but Dean just muttered a quick “Shut up, asshole” before kissing him again.

It felt weird. Of course it felt weird. He’d never kissed a guy, had never had been interested in kissing a guy, and kissing his _brother_ was a whole new level of strange. But he fought down the discomfort and kissed Sam, because this was the only way to get him to stay.

Sam had leaned into it for a moment, long enough to make Dean hope it would work, but still Sam tensed up almost immediately and pulled back. “Why did you do that?” he whispered. “Why did you have to make it worse?”

“I need you to stay, Sam. If this is what you want, you can have it.”

Sam drew his eyebrows together. “But it’s not what you want.”

He didn’t. Not really. But he needed Sam. And he wanted to do whatever he could to make him stay. “It is,” he said softly, almost trying to convince himself as much as Sam.

“Seriously, Dean. You made it clear this is pretty fucking far from okay with you.”

“Okay, how about this,” Dean said. “One time. Give me one chance. You’ve wanted this for years, Sam. And hell, based on what I could tell from that kiss, I’ll probably warm up to it fast, too.” He cracked a nervous smile. Sam didn’t smile back, but the offer still seemed to break through. He had such a look of longing on his face, one that Dean had never seen Sam give anyone before. One that nobody had ever given Dean.

“I don’t know,” Sam said. “It just… I don’t know. You don’t…”

“Jesus, Sam, I’m giving you the green light here. Can you please stop overthinking it and just fucking kiss me?”

Something in Sam seemed to snap. The distant longing in his eyes flashed to lust in a moment and then he was kissing Dean again, hard and hungry. “One time,” Sam repeated in a whisper against Dean’s lips. There was a confident, assertive side that Dean had rarely seen before showing now as Sam took the lead, his arms wrapping around Dean. Dean had never given much thought to his brother’s sex life before, but he was surprised by how competent Sam was—his tongue running along Dean’s lips, coaxing Dean to open his mouth, sliding his tongue in, soft and warm. It might have felt good, if it hadn’t been Sam.

Sam’s hands slid under Dean’s t-shirt and Dean, wanting to keep Sam confident that this is what he wanted, pulled off his t-shirt and tossed it aside. Sam walked Dean backwards towards the bed, his mouth never leaving Dean’s.

Dean felt his knees bump against the edge of the bed and he fell back onto it, scooting back to give Sam space. Sam crawled on the bed over Dean, pressing kisses from the edge of Dean’s mouth, along his jaw and neck and down his chest and stomach until he stopped just over the top of Dean’s jeans.

Dean clenched his jaw and swallowed, staring at the ceiling. He could do this. He had to do this.

Sam’s hands undid Dean’s belt but then stopped. Dean looked down at Sam, who was watching him carefully.

“Are you sure?” he asked. “You don’t have to. We can stop.”

“I want to.”

“Just tell me, any time, and I’ll stop right away. Okay?”

“Do you always talk this much during sex?” Dean quipped, and Sam rolled his eyes. “Just fuck me already.”

It was difficult to get hard when Sam went down on him. He was stuck in his own thoughts, swirling around in his brain. _You’re a monster. Your own brother? Is it worth it?_ And then, _Of course it’s worth it. He’s Sam. He’s family._

But he shoved those thoughts aside, closed his eyes and tried to imagine Sam was someone else. He conjured images into his mind of the girls from his favorite porn mag, an edition he’d been through so many times he had every page memorized. He knew Sam would be looking at him. Sam would want him to enjoy it, and he had to pretend he did. So he kept his eyes shut and his mind full of images of beautiful women and as a slick tongue slid up and down his length, he was able to imagine this was okay, just long enough until he came.

He kept his eyes carefully closed as he shuddered, pleasure coursing through his body. “Fuck,” he groaned involuntarily. Sam kept sucking Dean off until every drop was out, and then he felt Sam button back up his jeans, crawl up next to him, and lay down.

Dean couldn’t keep his eyes shut forever. Not without seeming like he was doing his best to avoid the reality of the situation. He opened his eyes, and looked at Sam, propped up on his elbow and watching Dean with half-lidded eyes, and Dean forced the most genuine smile he could onto his face.

Sam smiled back at him. He looked calm, happy and at peace like Dean hadn’t seen since they’d been hunting together the past couple of years.

“Damn, Sammy,” Dean said, his voice hoarse. “How’d you learn to give head like that? Christ.”

Sam didn’t reply, just kept watching Dean.

“Your turn?” Dean asked, desperately hoping Sam wouldn’t want Dean to reciprocate but doing his best to keep his voice steady and upbeat nonetheless.

“No, that’s okay,” Sam said, and Dean felt a brief flood of relief. He’d made it through.

“So you won’t go?” Dean asked.

Sam’s look of contentment faded. “I don’t know, did it change your mind?”

Dean felt a brief wave of panic. Sam wasn’t stupid. Dean probably hadn’t pulled even close to a convincing enough act for Sam to believe he’d been into that. Dean shrugged. “It felt right, man. I know it shouldn’t have, but it did.”

Sam nodded, but he looked deflated. Dean obviously wasn’t pulling this off as well as he’d hoped.

“Please stay,” Dean said, and the desperation was obvious in his voice this time. His voice wavered as he continued. “I still haven’t shown you all my moves, right? Anything you want, I’ll give it to you.”

Sam still looked hesitant. “Dean, you don’t have to. I know you don’t want to.”

Tears welled up in Dean’s eyes. “Okay, so maybe it didn’t do it for me this time. But I’ll start to like it eventually.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Sammy…” Dean said, quickly trying to salvage the situation, quickly, before he lost Sam forever. “I know it’s weird. It’s not exactly normal. I know. But please. I don’t think you’re a freak. I don’t think you’re disgusting. And I’m yours, for as long as you want me, okay? I’m yours.”

The longing was back in Sam’s eyes for a moment, and then resignation. “Yeah. Yeah, okay. I’ll stay.”

Thank god. Dean rolled onto his side and leaned in to kiss Sam, and when their lips met, he was surprised to find he actually did enjoy it. The overwhelming relief, the sense of belonging... He couldn’t help but feel satisfied. And if this is what made Sam happy, then Dean would have to find a way to be happy with it too.


End file.
